The final Goodbye
by Sportygirl4evar
Summary: Payton Dramer has been in Erwin's squad since she graduated. After years and years of torture she finally decides to leave and go Levi's squad. In her time there she learns things she has never felt before.
1. Chapter 1

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p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"A/n: so I was recently introduced to this anime and I LOVED it. And I got the best idea for an angst so I hope you enjoy! I don't own anything from Attack on Titanbr /~Special thanks to Animelover200013 for making me watch this anime!/span/p  
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"Levi pov/span/p  
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"I sighed walking up to HQ, not looking forward to what Erwin had in store for me today. I climbed up the stairs, walking quickly. I reached the office and took in a sharp breath, looking at the dusty, messy /I rapped my hand on his door, standing /"Come in, Levi," Erwin said as I placed my hand on the door. Erwin and I acknowledged each other with our eyes as I took the seat adjacent to /"Levi, I'm sure you are busy, but I have a new recruit for you, her name is Payton Dramer. She is currently in my custody and I want you to have her in your squad." Erwin said, passing me the file. I opened it and scanned the contents: 5" 7', brown eyes, black hair, good soldier, placed in Erwin's squad immediately, graduated from the 93rd /"Why am I getting stuck with this brat?" I asked, looking at her /"Because you need her. Something has been brought to our attention that I cannot tell you about at the moment, but I will brief you ASAP." Erwin said, picking up another /"When is she arriving?" I asked, looking over each of the notes that was sloppily scribbled on the /"She is already being briefed by Petra at the new location," Erwin said passing me the file that contained information on where we were moving. I sighed and closed both files. Erwin dismissed me and I walked out. Why the hell was a higher up from Erwins squad coming into my squad, and why was she immediately placed in Erwin's squad? These thoughts passed through my head as I got on my horse. I rode back to the old location, quickly packing the little things I had. I slung it on my shoulder and took a nice, long horse /-br /Payton pov/span/p  
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"I straightened up in my chair, brushing a stray hair behind my ear. The carriage stopped and I got out, my boots clicking with each step. I was greeted by a blonde and she grinned, so I mustered a fake smile and looked at her. I turned my back to her and grabbed my bag out of the back. I strode up to the castle and she greeted /"Finally, someone normal to talk to," she said, smiling widely. "Hi! I'm Petra, I'll be briefing you until Captain Levi gets here," she said, outstretching her hand. I grabbed it and /"I'm Payton," I said letting /"Come on, I'll show you to your room," Petra said walking into the dirtied castle. I grimaced and walked after /"So, we are leaving for an expedition in a couple of days, so we will probably only get about 5 hours to rest. Probably less depending on Levi," Petra /"Why is that?" I asked as we walked up the /"Oh, you'll see," she said, frowning a little. I narrowed my eyes but continued to follow. We stopped at a door and Petra motioned for me to go in. I turned the rusty handle and walked in, admiring the room. In Erwin's squad we didn't stay in one place often, always fighting titans or finding something /"What do you think?" Petra asked, interrupting my /"It's nice," I said, looking at the dusty /"It must be smaller than most of the places you've had with Erwin's squad," Petra said. I grimaced at her words and blocked the memories from entering my /"It is even better," I said, gritting my teeth. A knock on the door brought me out of my anger and I looked at the open door. A man with neat and shaggy black hair and thin looking eyes strode /"We are starting to clean. Petra you're with Oluo cleaning the basement and kitchen, Payton you are outside with the stalls and weeds," the guy said, walking /"Who the hell was that?" I asked, throwing my bag on the bed, uplifting /"That was Captain Levi," Petra said walking out to go clean. I sighed and walked back outside. I headed towards the stall where the horses were standing in the gross stalls. I wrinkled my nose and walked to the pasture, grabbing a rake. I hummed to myself as I cleaned, relaxing into my new surroundings. I scooped everything into the wheelbarrow and rolled it to where there was a blank spot. I tipped it over and rolled it in front of the first stall. I led all of the horses into pasture and started mucking the stalls. I finished quickly and brought the horses back. I didn't mind cleaning things that had to with horses, they remind me of my old life, my old /I shook my head free of the thoughts and walked to get the hay bales. I put each hay bale for the horses and put a tack box next to each stall for the owners. I frowned when I realized my horse wasn't here yet. I sighed and walked away, slipping on my gloves and starting to pull the weeds. After about 40 minutes of standing in the blazing sun pulling weeds, I finished. I sniffed my arm and wrinkled my nose at how gross I smelt. As I started to return to the castle, Levi walked /"Oi, Payton did you finish?" He asked, staring at /"Yes Captain," I responded, standing straight. He nodded and motioned for me to follow as he went to check my work. We walked around the stalls and around the castle, inspecting the area for any missed /"You did better than these fools," Levi said as we walked back into the castle. I glanced at everyone who was busy probably redoing their work. I smirked and walked to my room, grabbing my clothes and heading into the shower, relaxing a little more as I soaked. I let my hair down once it dried, running my brush through the tangles. I laid back down on my freshly made bed, letting the wet hair spots on my uniform dry. I let my thoughts drift, thinking about what my next move would be. Obviously I would be here, but what about when I see Erwin? How am I supposed to act? How will he act? Almost, as if on cue, a knock was on my /"Who is it?" I asked , picking my head up a little. A male I didn't recognize walked in and was holding a bouquet of /"Hi! I'm Oluo, I'm with you in this squad." He said, smiling brightly. I put on my fake smile and looked at /"I'm Payton,"I said, brushing that same damn strand of hair behind my /"You'll meet Eld tomorrow, but these came for you," he said handing me the flowers. He turned and walked out, closing the door behind him. I looked at the flowers in disgust and picked the card off of them. I opened it and recognized the handwriting almost immediately./span/p  
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"Payton,br /I hope Levi's squad is treating you well and I hope you are settling in nicely. I would like you to come to my office tomorrow at around noon. See you then./span/p  
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"Erwin/span/p  
p style="border: 0px; outline: 0px; font-style: inherit; vertical-align: baseline; list-style: none; margin: 1.286em auto; padding: 0px;"span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"I grimaced at the end of the note and tossed the flowers out the window then tore up the note, throwing it outside as well. I heard Petra call for dinner and I sighed in relief. I left the room, trotting to the dining room. Petra lined the table with bowls filled with stew and utensils.I took a seat and Petra slid next to me. Across from us sat Oluo and Levi sat at the head of the table. They talked about the upcoming expedition and Levi and I sat /"So Payton, why'd you get bumped down?" Oluo /"Oluo!" Petra yelled, kicking under the /"I am not at liberty to say," I simply said, finishing my food. I stood up and walked to the kitchen, cleaning my plate. I slipped outside and ran to the stables, hoping my horse was finally here. To my happiness Phoenix greeted me by raising her head in acknowledgement. I grinned and let myself into her stable. I grabbed the tack box and started brushing her mane, singing to myself. I lifted her top mane to see the red growing underneath, I remember when I had to dye her mane black just so I could keep her as my horse in the squad. Then I just sewed on some other horses black mane to keep the red to make her unique. I smiled and laid her fake top mane back down, petting the red. She neighed in happiness and I laughed, for once in about 10 years. I frowned and continued to clean /"So what's her name?" Levi's voice rang through the /"Phoenix," I said as he walked in, picking up a brush and starting to brush /"How'd she get that name?" He asked and my brow furrowed, but I answered /"My mothers name," I said as I reached to brush her forehead. She put her head on my shoulder as if we were hugging and I patted her /"So what did happen between you and Commander Erwin?" Levi asked. I froze as the memories started flooding my mind. Do not cry I said to myself as I shook my /"Nothing important," I said as I /"It's late and you don't need to be out here any longer to catch a damn cold. I don't even know why you came out here idiot," Levi said, walking away. His words hurt and I followed him, hoping to return to his good side. We walked in slilence back into the castle to see that Oluo and Petra had gone to /"Goodnight Payton," Levi said as he walked up the /"Night," I said following him. I walked into my room and laid down, pulling the blanket over me as I kicked off my shoes. My eyes got heavy and I fell into a deep sleep./span/p  
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	2. Chapter 2

A/n: things start getting a little angsty now. Also there's a rape scene in here but it's not very bad. If you would like smut comment say the pairing in the comments telling me you want smut.

Payton pov

"_You're so pretty," Erwin said, stepping towards me. _

_"Th-thank you commander," I nervously replied, stepping back towards the door. Everything's moving quicker than normal, as if this nightmare was in fast forward, skipping parts._

_"Where are you going? Do I scare you?" he asked, moving faster. I tried the door handle, but it was locked and only he knew how to open it. Suddenly, I was swept off of my feet and slammed up against the wall, a hand covering my mouth. I squirmed and tried to push him off but he was too strong._

_"Shhhhhh, it's all going to be okay," he said as he ripped open my shirt. My eyes widened as he ripped off my pants as well. I understood now and I squirmed faster, his mouth muffling my screams as tears rolled down my cheeks. Help…_

I bolted awake, draped in sweat.

"Payton, are you okay?" Petra asked, sitting next on the edge of my bed.

"Yeah," I said, swallowing. I could still feel his hands on me and I suddenly remembered that I had to meet with him today. I jumped up and glanced at the clock, 10:30. Shit, I thought as I pulled on my shoes and jacket. I jogged outside to the stables and swiftly saddled Phoenix. I jumped on and rode to town, hoping I wasn't to late. I ran up to his office and knocked on the door.

"Come in," he said. I pushed the door open and was relieved and surprised to see Levi sitting there.

"Ah Payton, you made it," Erwin said, his eyes flashing me an evil gin that chilled me to the bone. I slid into the seat next to Levi and picked up the file. "Let me catch you up to speed. Recently today, a male by the name of Eren Jaeger was discovered to be a Titan Shifter. Sadly, the Military Police Brigade managed to get custody of him before his trial. Our job is to try and earn him over at the trial. Each of you have your parts that are briefed in your folder. Levi, you are dismissed," Erwin said in one fell swoop. No, don't go, I thought to myself, but knowing Erwin, I would be dead before I could mutter a single word. Levi saluted and stepped outside. Erwin stood and locked the door, turning back to me. My bones chilled as I saw the look in his eye and I braced myself as he pushed a new button on his desk. That's weird I thought. A bookcase moved and a door opened. I stared and was caught off guard as he wrapped a ball gag around my mouth. I squirmed as he pulled my hair, leading me into the doorway. Tears streamed down my cheeks as the door closed behind me. He tied me to a hook, tying my legs apart and my arms up.

"It's been a while," he whispered in my ear. I cried harder and struggled against my restraints as I heard him laugh. The tears clouded my vision and I didn't see him reach for something. I soon realized what it was as he brought a whip hard against my stomach. I cried against the restraints as he kept whipping me. I felt the welts grow as he continued on relentlessly.

"Commander?" Levi's voice rang out. I felt hope well up in my chest, but much to my dismay, the commander had a plan. He climbed up a ladder that led who knows where, and after a few seconds, his and Levi's voices floated to my ears. I cried hard, all hope of escaping this hell vanishing as the commander came back.

"Where were we?" Erwin asked, his evil smile peeking through the darkness.

I got back on my horse, heading towards the place I always went to clear my head. My old house, underground. I dropped Phoenix off next to the tunnel and ran in, tears streaming my vision. I made it to the house, the hole in the earth that let me look at the sky was covered by some weeds that I hastily tore down. I sat on my broken roof, quietly crying.

"I'm so sorry Mom and Dad. I should have listened to you and not join the Survey Corps. I'm so, so sorry," I whispered, letting my head fall into my lap, staining my clothes. After my tears settled, I looked up at the sky, realizing it was about 6. I wiped my eyes and made my way out of the tunnel.

-flashback

"How did you manage to get into Erwin's squad?" A member of the squad asked.

"I know when to trust people, and I know how to keep myself focused."

Heh, how wrong was I? I don't know when to trust people at all, I thought to myself, mounting Phoenix. She neighed, sensing my upset. I gently pat her and we head to the castle. I reached the walkway and untucked the file that I put under my clothes, well my new clothes that I had to grab. I led Phoenix into her stall and put an apple in her food mill. I walked to my room, ignoring the squad yelling for me to come eat and talk. I locked my door and sat at my desk, opening the file. I scanned the contents and summed it up. My job is to befriend Eren and all his friends. Glorious, I thought to myself, sighing. The scent of Erwin reach my nose and the tears started again, my mind reeling with the images and the feelings running through my head. I grabbed my pajamas and hurried into the shared bathroom. I took a shower, washing about 10 times to at least feel semi-clean. I went back to my room and saw a plate with various food on it and a note. I picked up the note and read,

Payton,

You need to eat something, you haven't eaten all day. I'm here if you need me or if you just need a hug.

~Petra

I smiled and flipped it over.

My office now.

~Captain Levi

I scowled and took a bite out of whatever food was on my plate and walked down the hall. I knocked on his door and he greeted me silently with his eyes. I walked in and he closed the door behind me.

"You wanted me Captain?" I asked, feeling a little light headed.

"Yes, tomorrow a carriage will be here at 8 so you can head to town. Commander wants you to start your mission tomorrow," Levi said, sitting and sipping his tea.

"Alright," I said, slumping into the seat.

"You are to stop at HQ and get your Maneuvering Gear in case of an emergency. The trial is at 3. You will try your best not to be late," he spoke in his monotone voice.

"Yes, Captain," I said. He made a shooing motion with his hand and I stood up, wincing in pain as my clothes shifted against my welts. I bit my lip and walked back to my room. I closed the door and rummaged through my bag, looking for the cream to make the welts heal faster. Ah, here it is, I thought, clutching the white bottle. I lifted up my shirt and rubbed some on my stomach, feeling the sweet relief. I closed the cap, ignoring the welts everywhere else and laid down. My eyes were heavy so I let them flutter shut, falling into sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

A/n: I hope your enjoying so far! Eren, Mikasa, and Armin come into play soon! A little mooorrreeeee angst. Levi gets a little OOC at times because he's starting to warm up to Payton, but will return ASAP. Also, if you want a certain pairing, be sure to let me know!

Levi pov

Something was still bothering me. I could have sworn I heard someone whimpering in the commanders office earlier today. Tch, it's just my imagination. I have more important things to worry about, I thought, ruffling the papers on my desk. A knock on my door reminded me about the note I left Payton, and made me curse under my breath. I reluctantly got up and opened the door and allowed her to walk in. I quickly briefed her on the plan for tomorrow, analyzing her as she stared at me. She looked scared and depressed, and wouldn't meet my gaze. I swiftly dismissed her and she shuffled out, looking more dejected than when she arrived. Something is definitely wrong. I need to figure out what it is. I hate not knowing when someone's fucking with my squad. I devised a plan and got to work. I cleaned, finished papers, the whole 9 yards. I continued working 'till nightfall, still continuing to organizing all of my belongings to delay until I went to check on Payton. I opened her door to see her thrashing about on her bed, shaking in her own sweat. I neared and pulled up her desk chair, watching as she shook her head, tears streaming down her face. When she moved again, the bottom of her shirt lifted up and I scowled. Ten large welts crossed the bottom of her stomach, some continuing down and some continuing up. I was filled with an ferocious anger I have never felt before. I wanted to murder whoever hurt her like this. The jealousy, the anger, the love, the sadness, all of the emotions were so overwhelming. I stopped dead in my track. Why do I care so much? I thought to myself looking back over my shoulder. I shook my head, ruffling my raven tresses and turning back towards her. I remembered my old home underground and devised another plan.

"Oi, Payton," I called loudly. Hoping to wake her from her nightmare. I kicked her bedpost, shaking her. She bolted up right and looked around thrashing her arms.

"Corporal, what's happening?" She asked, wiping her brow.

"Get dressed, we're going out on a ride," I said turning around on my heel and striding out. I quietly walked outside into the cold night, a light breeze ruffling my hair. I walked to the stable, going to both of our horses and waking them from their slumber. I stood by the entrance, waiting for her to walk out.

Payton pov

I watched the Corporal walk out of my room and I realized how I must look in my current state. I looked down and saw one of my wounds had reopened and was bleeding. Shit, I hope he didn't see, I thought to myself as I pushed myself out of the bed. I slapped a bandaid on the wound and carefully got dressed, wincing as the bruises started to swell. I rushed to meet Levi outside and saw him standing with my horse.

"Oi, hurry up brat," Levi said, tossing the reins at me. I furrowed my brow and mounted Phoenix, tears on the brink of falling from the new, excruciating pain. Levi set off in a trot and I followed him deep into Wall Rose. The town was silent and the walkways were deserted. We slowed to a walk in the square so we wouldn't wake anyone, and Levi slowed his horse so that it was in stride with mine.

"This is where we stop," Levi said, stopping next to HQ. I kicked my foot over, and realization hit me too late. My other foot had slipped out of the stirrup while I had kicked my foot. Why do I have to be so God damn clumsy? I wondered as everything moved in slow motion. I fell towards the dusty sidewalk. Could this be the end to all of my torture? Would it all have been for nothing? Just to die by slipping off of a horse and landing in my head? I thought as I braced myself for impact, tears clouding in my eyes. I waited, and waited for what seemed like eternity but nothing happened. I whimpered at the pain spreading from my welts and opened my eyes.

"Tch, you're as reckless as the rookies," Levi said, his voice vibrating against my face. I looked up and saw his gray eyes staring into mine. He saved me. Lance Corporal Levi saved me, the second most heartless person in the world, humanity's greatest soldier. I leaned into his touch, feeling as though it was right. I pressed a shaky hand against his chest, feeling his heartbeat. He slowly rose from the ground as I stiffened against his chest, painful memories of Erwin holding me ran through my head. I struggled in Levi's grasp, practically jumping out of his arms. A burning in my chest made me bend over, coughing hard.

"Idiot, you're so reckless," Levi said, picking me back up. He carried me bridal style down the stairs as my mind reeled. Where is he taking me? I thought, as my heart picked up speed. I looked at him and he gently set me on my feet, his arm still wrapped around my shoulders.

"Corporal?" I whimpered, fear inducing my heart.

"Shh,"he whispered, grabbing my forearm. He dragged me down the same tunnel where I lived, but kept going straight. He slowed, light entering the dark cave. A blanket peeked out in the moonlight and Levi neared it. He released me, sitting down with his legs outstretched, leaning on his hands. I marveled at his features in the moonlight, his uniform outlining his muscles.

"Oi, are you going to stare or are you going to join me?" Levi asked, staring at the stars. I shook my head and sat next to him, holding my knees against my chest.

"It's so pretty," I said, letting myself relax a little.

"Yeah," Levi said. I almost forgot he was there. I looked at him, to see him looking back at me. I blushed and turned to looked back at the stars, feeling his gray eyes still on me.

"Payton?" Levi asked. I looked back at him.

"Yes, Corporal?" I responded, staring into his eyes.

"Why do you have welts on your stomach?" He asked, his face emotionless. I stiffened, the memories returning.

"Um, that is confidential," I said, a chill running down my spine.

"I am your commanding officer and I order you to tell me," Levi said, his voice sharp.

"Yes, but I have been ordered by the Commander to keep it confidential," I said, looking back at the stars, a tear threatening to fall.

"Tell me," Levi said, inching closer.

"No," I whispered, tears dripping down my cheeks.

"Why are you crying?" He asked, holding my face in his hand. I cried harder at his sudden act of kindness.

"I-I can't tell you," I whimpered as he wiped a tear away. He frowned but moved quickly, and we were on the ground laying side by side. We faced each other and Levi pet my hair, calming me down.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I asked, trying to stop my tears.

"Because you are like me, memories haunting you and messing with you every day, and as a plus, you're cute for an idiot," Levi said. I grinned and pressed my head against his chest as he murmured in my ear.

"It will be okay, I promise," he whispered as I drifted off to sleep. For the first time in ten years, I didn't have a nightmare.

A/n: I shall be trying to upload every weekend!


	4. Chapter 4

A/n: mehhhhhhhh. I hope you enjoy. Different povs will probably only be used in important situations... Sowwie

Ps thanks guest for the kudos! And thanks risugaki for following! Sorry this chapter went up so late, my friend who usually reads it to make sure it's decent started school.

Payton pov

"Brat, get up," Levi said, shaking me. I rustled and opened my eyes, staring in his gray eyes.

"No," I groaned, laying back on Levi's chest. As I shut my eyes I realized how well we fit together, like puzzle pieces.

"Up," Levi said, picking me up and standing in the process. He set me on my feet and I wiped my eyes. I opened my mouth to argue, but was interrupted by my stomach growling. I blushed and bent over, grabbing my hair tie that fell off while we slept.

"If you can manage to hurry, ill get you some food," Levi said, brushing off the dust on his uniform. I stood straight and walked towards the exit, shuffling my feet as I tossed my hair in a ponytail. I mounted my horse as Levi stood next to me.

"I really appreciate last night," I whispered, blushing.

"I meant what I said," he said, looking deep in my brown eyes.

"And that was?" I asked, my brain still foggy. He started walking away, mounting us horse.

"You're cute for an idiot," he smiled and rode off. I sat, heart racing. I got Levi to _smile, _how many people can say that! I grinned and rode off towards the training grounds, preparing myself for this torture.

I was greeted by a guard, taking my horse. I walked on the familiar grounds, memories swirling around. I heard the instructor informing the kids about how they have to decide where they'll end tonight. He saw me across the walkway and stopped his speech.

"Today we have a surprise special guest, meet Payton Dramer. Member of Commander Erwin's squad and top student over the past 104 years," he said as I stood next to him. Rows of teens saluted me and I tipped my head in acknowledgement.

"Actually, I am now a part of the special operations squad and am here on official business from the commander. Will Mikasa Ackerman and Armin Arlert meet me by the gates, that is all," I said, my voice ringing loudly. I saw the two of them walk towards the gate and I followed. I heard the instructor continue yelling and the two stopped, Mikasa leaning against the gate.

"Come on, we can't talk here," I said as the guard brought our horses. I mounted and try followed my lead, and I led us to the castle. After 30 minutes of nothing but the horses hooves we reached the castle. I yucky ties Phoenix and brought them to m y room. They awkwardly sat on the bed and I on the chair Levi left, facing them.

"Why are we here?" Mikasa asked, staring at me boldfaced.

"First off, I'm here to help unlike what the police brigade is doing. Secondly, I need you to trust me to help Eren," I said looking at each of them. They both seemed to relax a little at m words.

"What do you want to know?" Armin said, his voice quiet.

"Gown long have you known eren?" I asked, crossing my leg.

"Since I was a kid, eren and Mikasa stood up for me against bullies," Armin said as Mikasa tensed.

"You don't have to share anything that makes you uncomfortable, just a general time dram would work," I said, looking at Milasa.

"Kids, he adopted me as his sister," she spat, her voice rough.

"Mikasa she's just trying to help eren," Armin said.

"How about this, you answer all of my questions and ill answer yours," I said, leaning forward. Mikasa seemed more relaxed now and she looked at me.

"What's going to happen to eren if you guys don't get custody of him?" Mikasa asked, her eyes tearing up. I sighed and wiped my palms.

"I'm going to be blunt because they're no easy way to say this, he's going to get experimented on and then killed," I said, not looking at Mikasa directly.

"No," she whispered, clutching the scarf around her neck.

"What are you going to do?" Armin asked.

"We hope to do harmless experiments, and have him join our squad," I said putting a hand on Mikasas leg. "If it would make you comfortable, I will try and make sure you will be there," I said, looking in her eyes.

"I would appreciate that," she whispered.

"Come on, it's time for the trial, you'll be sitting near Hanje, remember her?" I asked leading them out.

"Yes," Mikasa and Armin said. As we walked down the steps I grimaced as Oluo called out.

"Hey Payton! Who's the rookies you got with cha!" Oluo yelled, taking a swig of beer.

"Screw off Oluo!" I yelled, leading us outside.

"Who was that?" Armin asked once the door was shut.

"That's Oluo, don't let him give you a hard time if you make it here," I said, mounting my horse. _Lets get this over with,_ I thought and raced towards hq.

A/n: sorry so short, had to get this chapter done ASAP so the short trial could start!


	5. Chapter 5

A/n: annndddddd trial time.

I stood on our survey corps aid as the remaining people shuffled in. I leaned back and forth as the commander passed behind me. He ran his hand across my butt. I flinched and stepped away from him. Levi looked at me oddly and stepped between us. I breathed a sigh of relief and continued waiting for everyone else to arrive. I scoured the crowds and made a slight wave towards Mikasa and Hanji , hoping to get there attention. Mikasa met my gaze and nodded, then looked forward, deep in thought. The room quietly chatted until the doors swung open, and a chain flanked against the ground. I sat quietly during the trial, gasping slightly when Levi began beating Eren. I looked at Mikasa and I told her, with my eyes, to stay out and let Levi do his thing. She looked between Hanji and I and reluctantly stood back, her body slightly shaking in anger. the trial soon came to an end and I quickly ran up to Mikasa, knowing she would want to talk. I grabbed her arm and pulled her out the nearest door.

"What the hell was that about?" Mikasa spat as we stood outside hq, my 3d gear rattling.

"Okay, I didn't know he was going to do that, but I know why he did it," I said, taking a sharp breath as my gear rolled harshly against my skin.

"And why is that?" She spat, obviously pissed that eren got hurt.

"To show that Eren can be controlled by Levi, that if something bad happens, Levi can handle the situation. Like when he didn't have control and couldn't recognize his own sister, Levi would be able to cut him out and save everyone in a bad situation," I said, explaining in a low voice. She tensed at the memory she just had to explain a few moments ago.

"I get it, but why'd he have to be so brutal," She asked, her voice small.

"From what I know of him, that's all he knows what to do," I said, putting a hand on her shoulder. She didn't seem to feel better at my words and I led her out. We parted and I mounted Phoenix, getting ready to head home.

"Oi, Payton," Levi's voice rang out, I turned my head to see him walking up.

"Yes Captain?" I asked, turning Phoenix around to face him.

"Tomorrow your job is to brief all of the new cadets with Petra," Levi said, looking deep in my eyes.

"Yes sir," I said nodding my head. I realized I still had my gear on and quickly stripped it off, thinking Levi had left. I managed to gently plop everything on the ground without stabbing myself or anyone else. I slid off of Phoenix and turned, almost knocking over Levi. He caught me and helped me regain my footing. I looked into his eyes, losing myself in the stormy gray, as someone clearing their throat brought me back to reality. I jumped out of his arms and Levi rolled his eyes.

"Hello Commander," Levi said, standing straight, a chill went up my spine as he looked at me.

"Commander," I said, regaining control.

"Hello, Payton follow me," he said, walking ahead. I flinched and followed, my heart racing. I looked back at Levi, and he furrowed his eyebrows at me. I turned back around, accepting my fate. Once we were at the stairwell, Erwin turned and grabbed my neck.

"So you thought you could just go flirting with anyone you like? That I wouldn't care or be mad? Get this in your head, you, are, mine!" He growled, closing his grip. I gasped for air, but he wouldn't let up. His eyes were purely evil and he was grinning. I took one hand off of his and slapped him, right across his face. He stumbled back and I took the moment to hold him against the wall.

"You don't own me ass face, I own myself. And if you think I'm standing by and letting you use me like this you're wrong. I'm done letting you take advantage of me, I'm done keeping what you've done to me a secret, I'm done with you. If you want to fire me go ahead and try, but I have evidence to show Pixis to get your stupid ass locked in a cellar," I said fuming. He laughed, his smile completely evil.

"You think Pixis isn't in my debt?" He asked. I widened my eyes in surprise, as he took the moment of distraction to pin me against the wall.

"I will keep fighting you with my last breath," I snapped, finally done being his little play thing to discard whenever he liked. He smiled more and lifted my shirt and scratched across my stomach, tearing scabs and scratching the welts. I clenched my mouth closed and stared him in the eyes, showing him I would not give into him. He smiled and kept scratching, just waiting for a scream. I held in all my emotions, showing him the emotionlessness face that I could use at any moment. He slid down and looked up at me, his face at my stomach. He grinned up and ran a finger over one of the welts, his finger making my welt scream in agony. I took the moment to kick him in between his legs. He groaned and I pushed him over as he laid in pain. I ran to the door, locked. I looked back to see he was getting back up, cursing under his breath. I scowled and started going to the stairs, kicking him over again. I pounded up the stairs and into his office, I kept running and ran threw his window, hearing it shatter against me. I quickly slid on my side down the lower roof, shards of glass sticking into my leg and ridges of the roof stabbing me. I slid off the roof and towards the ground, widening my legs slightly. I felt Phoenix underneath me and I landed, wincing at the pain. I rode towards the tunnel, telling Phoenix to hide while she waits. I jumped off and rolled into a run, sprinting in matter of seconds. I ran into the tunnel, turning quickly towards my old house. I ran up the rusty steps, one breaking under my foot. I groaned in surprise and agony and pulled myself up, and out of the hole. Then pulled my foot out of the hole and ran up to roof, sitting in a ball. I waited for the tears to start falling, a simple wail to come out, but nothing came. I felt my cheeks for the dampness, dry.

'Why?' I thought, marveling at the new discovery. 'Have I gotten stronger?' I thought sitting staring at the sky, sun setting. 'If only,' I thought, as the awaited tears threatened to fall. After a couple of hours I walked back out to the entrance of the tunnel and whistled, listening to Phoenix trot up. I put my foot in the stirrup, and went to swing my leg over. I barely got it over, wincing in pain.

"We gotta hurry," I told Phoenix, and we rose to the castle, at top speed. It felt like an eternity until I saw the driveway, my eyes threatening to close.

"Phoenix, hurry, if you can," I groaned, gripping onto her reins with an iron tight grip. She neighed and sped forward, slowing to a stop once we reached the front gates. Phoenix neighed and I relaxed, my eyes shutting closed.

A/n: whatdya think? Is Payton going to survive? Is Erwin going to leave her alone? *cues dramatic music* and rereading this holy shit is it short. i am so sorry.


	6. Chapter 6

A/n: More of a little OOC with Levi. Levi pov I filed the papers, sliding them into a folder. Eren was probably already asleep down in the basement, and everyone was cleaning up dinner. I sipped my tea, finally relaxing when a horse started neighing. "Oi, quiet down," I yelled towards my window. The horse just continued to get louder and I silently cursed under my breath. I set my cup of tea down and walked outside. "Oi! I said qui-" my throat caught when I saw why the horse was neighing. Payton laid on the floor, her right leg bleeding and her eyes closed, her chest moving very shallowly. "Call the Doctor!" I yelled to the house, they all peered outside and saw Payton laying on the ground. I turned my attention back to her and picked her up, taking her inside. Petra saw her and cleared the table and put down a red sheet. I laid her down and pressed an ear to her chest. Her heart was slowing by the second. I grabbed one of the knifes from the counter and cut of the pant leg of her uniform. I tore away the fabric and looked at her leg in awe. It was covered in blood and had a bunch of broken glass shards lodged in different places, some to deep for me to take out before the doctor arrived. I grabbed a spare glove from the cabinet and asked Petra for her tweezers. I tied my cleaning mask around my mouth and pulled a chair up to Payton's leg. I got to work, pulling out all of the glass shards I could, time going excruciatingly slow. Finally after what felt like an eternity, the front doors busted open. I moved over and the doctor got to work, not asking any questions. I left the room and went back to my room. I picked up my tea which was now cold. "What a waste of good tea," I groaned and dumped it out in the sink. I tore off the bloodied gloves and tossed them in the trash, and pulled off my cleaning mask. "What did that idiot do this time to get hurt like that?" I groaned, staring at my door, debating whether or not to go supervise. "God dammit, why does this girl have this affect me like this!" I groaned, slamming my fist on the table. I sighed and reluctantly walked out to the dining room. Everyone had left and I watched from the stairwell, staring at her newly cleaned leg. I stared in awe at all the puncture wounds, quickly being covered in a wrap. I sighed in relief as he taped the wrap closed. He lifted her shirt and he gasped, the welts were actually worse. I leaned over and looked at the scratch marks, my eyes narrowing. I gritted my teeth as he lowered the remnants of her pants to uncover the rest of the welts. He eventually cut her out of her shirt and pushed it off of her shoulders. I looked down at my shoes as he continued his treatment. "You mind lending me a hand," the doctor asked, pulling Payton up off the table. I rushed forward and pulled off the shirt that was still stuck to her back. I held her up as he wrapped her stomach and chest. "Will she be okay?" I asked, laying her back down slowly. "Her leg will take a little time to recover, but her welts will be fine. Do you know how all of this happened?" He asked packing his things up. "No, and she refuses to tell anyone," I said, gritting my teeth. He nodded his head and left. I sighed and picked up Payton, taking her to her room and laying her on her bed. I covered her with the blanket and tucked her in. "Erwin, stop," she groaned shaking her head. "Payton?" I asked looking at her face. She fell back in her slumber and I furrowed my eyebrows. '_So it has something to do with Erwin',_ I sighed and left, returning to my room and changing into my pajamas. I slipped into my newly made bed and relaxed, falling into a somewhat relaxing sleep. - Payton pov '_I pushed Erwin down on the ground, stomping his chest with my foot. I pulled out my blades, holding them closely to his throat. _ _"Screw you," I spat and sliced, his throat bleeding. I wiped off the blades in his clothes and sheathed them, walking away. Light rain pelting my dirtied face, washing off the blood. I kept walking, hearing titans running up. I casted my anchors and ran up the wall, jumping over it. I heard the growls and yells of the titans as they devoured Erwin. 'I'm finally free,' I thought and ran. I ran and started falling, falling into a black abyss of nothing. I couldn't move, paralyzed by fear. Then I was suddenly strapped up, my mouth covered with a ball gag. _ _"You can't get rid of me that easily," Erwin said and hit me in my right leg, breaking it in half. I yelled in pain, tears streaking my cheeks. He moved onto the left leg, showing no mercy. Then the fingers, one by one he torturously snapped them, harder than the last. He looked in my panicked eyes as he grabbed my head, snapping it.'_ _-_ I blinked once, twice as my eyes focused. My room was lit by a single candle, as I tried to sit up. My chest caught and I looked down at my chest tightly wrapped, I wined and looked down at my leg which was also tightly wrapped. '_Shit, they know about the welts,' _I thought to myself. I laid back down and stared at the ceiling, trying to depict a plan to go get water. I looked at the clock on the wall 4:30, I cautiously swung my legs around and landed on my feet. I stood on my left foot, dragging my right down the stairs. Once I Managed to get in the kitchen, I made some tea. I somehow got it so that I didn't spill or drop anything. I limped back over to my room and held my tea cup so it didn't spill. I put a little weight on my right foot and winced at the sharp pain. I continued to limp into my room, where I set the tea cup on the chair and propped my back up against the wall I reached over to the chair and shakily grabbed my tea cup. I continued to sip my tea cup as the sun slowly rose. I put the cup back down and slid down to my previous sleeping position and closed my eyes. *********** I rustled and tried to shift, my leg making me wince again waking me up fully. I opened my eyes and saw a face just inches from mine. "Good morning Payton," Erwin said, grinning evilly. "Commander," I spat out and pulled the blanket up over my wrapped chest. "I see you have recently injured yourself, how did the event occur?" He asked, sitting up to look down at me. "Don't play dumb, but answer me this, am I off the survey corps?" I asked, narrowing my eyes. He sighed and looked at the door. "No, only because we need you. You have a way with people that gets them to trust you, despite the fact that you can think of words to make them feel like hell," Erwin said, putting a hand threw and over his slicked back hair. I sighed in relief and punched his hand that was making its way up my stomach. " I already told you, I'm done letting you use me," I growled, throwing his hair off my me. He looked at me, his piercing eyes sending a chill down my back. "Oh you'd be surprised how I can get my way," he turned and stood, pressing a little on my leg. I sneered in pain And reached down to clutch my leg. He walked out and I relaxed a little, just a little. ************** Levi pov I watched the commander walk out of Payton's room and I stood, watching him walk to the courtyard. As he reached outside, I called out to him while following him to his awaiting carriage. "Yes Levi?" He asked, turning to face me. "What's going on with you and Payton?" I asked , narrowing my eyes at him. "Nothing, why?" He asked, his brow furrowing. "She was talking in her sleep and you happened to be the one she talked about most. Mainly she just repeated Erwin stop," I said, standing my ground. "If I were you Levi, I would stand down," Erwin said turning and walking away. "I'm afraid I cannot do that sir, I don't want any more casualties. You know how much I hate those," I spat, unmoving. He continued to walk away and I stood and watched him get on his carriage. "I remember when you used to look up to me," Erwin said and his carriage rode away. "Levi?" Payton croaked, limping behind me. "You idiot, get your ass back inside," I growled, pointing to the door. "Leave it alone, I doubt it will ever be out in the open," she said, looking off in the distance. I widened my eyes, coming to a conclusion that pained my heart. "Are you and Erwin a couple?" I asked, facing her. "Oh GOD no!" She yelled, her eyes widening. "Then he won't mind this," I said, and grabbed Payton in my arms, kissing her. She was tentative and tried to push me off, but relaxed into the kiss. She wrapped her arms around my neck and we stood in the driveway in each others embrace. I pulled away and looked at her big brown eyes. "Why? Why me?" She asked, her voice catching slightly. "Because you drive me crazy, and I hate that about you. Besides that, I think you're the only person in this god forsaken hell that kind of gets it," I said, memories flashing by. She nodded and pulled my neck down, wrapping me in a passionate kiss. 


	7. Chapter 7

A/n: sooooooo romance. If you want a smut *thats why it's explicit* request it in the comments porfavor! OPEN TO ALMOST ALL SHIPS.

Payton pov

I said at the dining room table, smiling on the inside as I swirled my spoon in my tea.

"Payton? I mean, is it ok if I call you Payton?" Eren asked, emerging from the basement.

"Payton is fine," I said, still swirling.

"Okay, so, Payton, why were you talking to Mikasa and Armim?" Eren asked, sitting across from me.

"Ah, so you heard. Just info to help with the trial, none of it was useful though, you've got great friends," I said, my head spinning with pictures of all my friends before I enlisted and after the survey corps.

"Th-thank you," he said, looking down.

"Mikasa seems to really want to protect you," I said, sipping my tea.

"Of course she does, that's all she's ever worried about," he said, his hand gripping into a fist.

"She also seems to like you," I continued, not breaking a stride. I watched his cheeks flush a deep red, and he continued to not look at me.

"No, she only wants to treat me like a child," he said, STILL not looking at me.

"Look at me when your are talking," I growled, glaring at him. He picked up his head and looked at me, his cheeks getting darker.

"I-I'm sorry," he croaked, cheeks getting darker.

"I'm telling you, don't let your friends go. You only meet so many sane people in this hell," I said, pushing back in my chair. I put all my weight on my left foot and stood, turning. As I went to move forward, my cast/sling got caught on the chair. I started falling forward and put out my arms to break the fall. Nothing came. 'God dammit, who am I in debt to now!' I thought groaning. I looked up and much to my surprise, Eren was holding me but my armpits. He pushed me back up and just kinda stared at me for a while.

"Uh, thank you," I said, looking down. When I glanced back up, Erens face was inches from mine, lips puckered, his eyes closed. I leaned backwards and someone cleared their throat and we both looked to the stairwell to see Levi. I took a sharp breath as he walked over, glaring daggers at eren. He motioned for Eren to follow him downstairs and I feared for Eren. At the last moment I lunged forward and grabbed Levi's arm, turning him around.

"Please, don't hurt him," I said, looking at him. That only seemed to enrage him even more.

"Get to my office and wait for me there," he growled, and pulled away from my grasp. I sighed and made a mental note to go check on Eren after Levi chews him out. I limped to Levi's room/ office and walked in, laying on the bed. I stared at the ceiling, waiting as my eyes started to drift shut. The door creaked open and I lazily opened my eyes, looking at Levi walk in. His demeanor changed and he walked over to the bed, laying on the other side of me. I snuggled up against him as he spooned me.

"What happened Mr tough guy? Is cuddling your weakness?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Tch, as if. I just knew you were too much of a lazy ass to get up," he said, his eyes shining. He lightly kissed the top of my forehead and I smiled, falling into a deep sleep.

I blinked, looking over hoping to see Levi. Much to my avail, he was gone, probably off cleaning. I sighed and pushed myself up, swinging my legs over. I walked out of his office, turning and saw Petra who had just walked out of her room.

"Payton, what are you doing coming out of Levi's room?" She asked, her eyebrows arching.

"Oh, last night he told me to wait for him and I fell asleep, I guess he never did come back," I said rushed, blurting out the lie. She relaxed and laughed.

"I should have known it was nothing, Levi could do so much better," she said, walking away. My heart hurt from her words, but I followed her to the dining room anyways. I slid into a seat as she told the rest about my endeavor in Levi's room.

"We haven't met yet, I'm Eld," Eld said holding out his hand. I shook it and looked back at Petra.

"Payton," I said, accepting the cup of tea from Petra.

"Well, Payton may be average, but if I was Levi, I'd pick her over you," Oluo said. Petra seemed enraged by his comment and stepped on his foot.

"Your opinion, but Levi's smarter than that," Petra said sitting. I quickly downed my tea and cleared my throat.

"Do any of you know where Levi went? I'd like to hear what he was going to tell me last night," I said rushed.

"Yeah, he went to go do those experiments with Eren and Hanji, were heading there now" Eld said. 'Shit! I totally forgot!' I thought as I quickly got up wincing. I quickly limped outside and whistled for Phoenix. She quickly arrived, and I used all my strength to get up. I rode quickly, heading towards the location. As soon as I arrived, I was stopped by Armin, his eyes narrowed and focused.

"Armin, what are you doing?" I growled and he seemed to avert his eyes. He held out my uniform and my gear, and then my boots.

"Captain Levi has a message for you, if you wish to help, get in your uniform quickly," Armin said. I took the things and he pointed to a tent in the corner.

"Thank you Armin, sorry I was so harsh, it's just a bad morning," I said quickly. He seemed to relax and smile a bit before he left. I rode over to the tent and slid off, softly landing. I walked in and experimented putting a little weight on my foot, it didn't hurt as bad, so I kept adding. It didn't hurt, I sighed in relief and unwrapped my leg. I stared at scabs and frowned, pulling off the shorts and sliding on the strapped pants. I unwrapped the bandaging and looked at the other scabs, frowning again. I slid on my shirt, and then my jacket. My boots I basically jumped into and strapped on my 3d gear. I walked out, a slight limp on my leg. I remounted Phoenix and pat her head. I rode inside the camp and quickly made my way over to Levi's side.

"Cadet Payton, position yourself on my left flank, be ready for any need to stall Eren, but don't kill him, leave that to me," he yelled. I nodded and rose over to his left side, my swords ready.

"Okay Eren, transform!" Hanji yelled and shot her flare. We all waited for the smoke and lightning as Eren bit down on his thumb. Nothing. We stared and waited as he kept biting, deeper and deeper. Finally Levi rode up to him and pulled him out of the hole and pulled him onto his horse. I sighed in relief and turned around and head towards the picnic tables. I slid off and picked the cleanest one, sliding into the chair. Moments later everyone else piled in and picked seats. Levi slid next to me and seemed somewhat happy with the table. Members started handing out trays of food and I happily accepted. Everyone started casual chit chat, but Levi and I continued to sit in silence. I swirled my fork and felt Levi's hand on my thigh. I yelped in surprise and the people around us looked at me.

"Payton, are you okay?" Hanji asked, her eyes twinkling.

"Fine, thought I saw a spider," I said, looking down.

"Tch, you fight titans but you are afraid of a simple spider," Levi said, his hand massaging my thigh. A lightning bolt and a cloud of smoke erupted and Levi lead me away from everyone. He pulled me into the tent and we laid down, snuggling into him.

"Levi?" I asked looking up.

"Hmm," he said, his chest rumbling.

"Are we going to tell anyone? Petra saw me leave your room," I said, meeting his stormy eyes.

"Tonight i'll tell Erwin and then the squad," Levi said looking down at me. We shared one last kiss and went back outside. We packed up and I went to the castle while Levi went to hq. I sighed and made some tea, relaxing to the silence. I took two cups down to the basement and handed one to eren.

"So what'd Levi tell ya?" I asked, sitting in the chair.

"To watch out and don't get too cocky," Eren said, sipping. I nodded and sipped, sighing. We talked about his friends and today when he caught me by surprise.

"Why aren't you scared of me?" He said staring at me. I choked on my tea and looked at him.

"Excuse me?" I said, furrowing my eyebrows.

"Everyone stays away and avoids me, just because I'm a Titan shifter. Why aren't you?" He asked, his voice lifting.

"Eren calm down, I've met enough people to know when they are trustworthy. You are trustworthy so I will trust you and treat you the same as everyone else," I said standing. He stood up and jumped, hugging me. I stared at his head in shock, then hugged him back.

"Eren!" Levi yelled, and eren jumped back in fear. Levi appeared from the stairwell and glowered at him.

"Y-yes Captain?" Eren said, blushing.

"Go upstairs with the rest of the squad," Levi spat. Eren shuffled around us and stumbled up the stairs. Once I heard the door closed, I turned to Levi.

"What did Erwin say?" I asked looking at his angry eyes.

"He doesn't like the fact of me getting involved with anyone but he says he will support it," Levi said relaxing a little. I opened my eyes in shock, expecting much worse.

"Wow," I said, scratching my head.

"Now, why were you hugging eren?" Levi asked, the anger returning.

"Relax, he was just happy someone treats him decently," I said, waving my hand dismissively.

"I don't like you around him," Levi said, pinning me against the wall.

"He's a kid," I mumbled as he started kissing my throat.

"Still," Levi said as he captured my lips, and I leaned my head up so he didn't have to lean over me. I pulled away and took a deep breath.

"We need to go tell them," I whispered against his ear. He groaned in disapproval but released me. We clambered up the stairs and say at the dining room table.

"Squad, listen up. This may be a surprise to you but Payton and I are in a relationship. She will be treated the same as you shall be, do not think otherwise," Levi said. I watched as Petra's face made a frown, Oluo and Eld smiled.

"I called it," Oluo said, grinning like a child who just got a lollipop.

"In a short week we leave for the exposition, be prepared," Levi said.

"Yes sir!" We all said in unison. Levi nodded and sat down, sipping from the cup of tea that was made. I looked over at eren who seemed angry, but met my eyes and smiled. I drank my tea and kept to myself as the others chatted about the expedition. I put my cup in the sink and went outside, breathing in the air. I walked to my horse and she neighed in hello. I smiled a little and started brushing her mane, humming.

"I have a bone to pick. With you ," Petra said emerging, letting herself onto the stable.

"Petra lis-" I started, and stopped as her fist collided with my cheek. I held my cheek and stared at her in awe as Phoenix neighed and kicked her out of the stable. Petra screamed in pain as her back collided with the ground and I pet Phoenix, calming her down. Always with perfect timing, Levi emerged, scowling. I took a sharp breath as he advance to the fallen Petra. He pulled her up by her arm and whispered something in ear. She nodded and ran off, sobbing as she went into the castle. Levi turned towards me, rolling his eyes. He entered the stable and Phoenix angrily neighed at him. I pet her back, and looked at Levi. He took my cheek in his hand and I winced.

"You really are an idiot," he growled, pulling me out of the stable. I frowned as he pulled me through the house, getting a frown from Eren as we quickly ran past. As we passed Petra's room, I heard sobs and sniffles and felt the need to go comfort her. Levi had other ideas. He pulled me into his room, locking the door behind him.

"Wha-" I started, but was cut off as Levi pressed his lips against mine. I was resistant for a couple of seconds, still wanting to confront him about Petra, but gave in as his tongue licked my bottom lip. I wrapped my fingers in his raven terresas, pulling us closer together. He groaned against my mouth and I pulled away.

"What'd you say to Petra," I demanded, still holding holding each other.

"That you're the one I'm with and that that was uncalled for," Levi said, leaning down to kiss my neck. I groaned as he started to nibble on my collar bone. I pulled away, still not ready to be with anyone. I trusted Levi, but after Erwin, I shuddered breaking my thoughts and meeting Levi's questioning gaze.

"I just- I - I-" I stuttered and Levi kissed my forehead. He lead me to the bed and I laid in his arms.

"You're MY idiot," Levi whispered in my ear as I drifted to sleep.


End file.
